4am

Four A.M feels like… purgatory without you; alone with my thoughts. Nothing to comfort me but the gentle humming of the television in my room that does not work. You kissed me and it felt good for a while. Wrapped up in your arms; you could do no wrong. Except every time I tried to […]

Self-Love is not Vanity: A Love Poem To Myself

I love you; You before anyone else For you can not Love anyone Without first Loving yourself You have eyes that Shine in the darkest of hours and tell your story without any fear You are courageous and continue to love despite your traumatic past You have a way with words Which can be used […]

Breaking Point: The Last Goodbye

The breaking point was the last time you discarded me; kicked me out because You wanted me to be more like you. Told me I was weak And that you would not tolerate It in your Life. You said I didn’t deserve to be with you. Then told me I had to leave. Yet seemed […]

Love does not Conquer all

You are my rock And I want to tell you Everything… Because I know I can tell you Anything… But I don’t want you to worry I don’t want You to think you are not good enough I don’t want you To have any doubt That you have been My saving grace You took me […]

Narcissistic Love Addict

Out of fear and obsession I search for you hope to find you lerking in dark corners Yet pray when I get to them You are not there; that it was just a figment of my imagination I long for your friendship Yet know it would be the death of me You see I fell […]

Selective Amnesia

It’s amazing how your mind chooses to not remember events Blocks it out to protect your sanity and then one day it just hits you Like a ton of bricks To the back of the head When I left I felt empowered I felt strong; I felt like I could do anything I was determined […]

Sanity is Hard Work

Most days I do not Do much of anything I do not Get dressed I do not shower Or clean I just sit and try to hold The pieces together You see, I am a victim Of relationship trauma I spent 12 years with A man who swore he loved me Swore no one could […]

PTSD (A Never Ending Nightmare)

I can’t sleep; I lay awake Thinking, Remembering Trying to piece together Fragments of memory Attempt to shove them In the back of my mind Once I finally fall asleep My dreams haunt me Jolt me awake with tears In my eyes I fall asleep and dream my husband and I Are back together We […]

C- PTSD (Connect the Dots)

Complex PTSD is like a connect the dots puzzle Except once you’ve connected all the dots; you don’t have a pretty picture You have a victim A victim of Sexual assault A victim of childhood abuse A victim of Domestic Violence You have a woman who was sexually abused from age 3 to 14 You […]

Struggling to find my place

I’m too liberal to be conservative and too conservative to be Liberal. I do too much research to believe republican propaganda but am too logical to believe liberal conspiracy theories. Im a Christian but don’t believe religion should dictate political policies. I have a bleeding heart in world full of greed I am alone; stuck […]